Things Only Last for So Long
by arc.black
Summary: It wasn’t spontaneous. It had built up over the years. Always being pushed off to the side, never talking to only him, straight and face to face. She had no idea how much James cared for her.[A story of Lily, the Maurauders, and James' sister]
1. Everything Begins With a Single Step

"_Every journey starts with a single step"_

_- Chinese Proverb_

"Do I _have _to wake up?" groaned James from under his pillow, for about the tenth time in five minutes.

"Yes, dear. Breakfast is ready," said Sirius, uncannily mimicking James' mother.

"Really?" James practically shot out of bed, only to be greeted by three friends nearly laughing themselves sick. "Useless," he grumbled. How was he supposed to be able to tell Sirius' voice from Wanda Potter's, anyway? He got dressed in huffy silence, shooting the most malicious glare he could at, "Five in the morning?" he yelped. "What the blazes did you lot wake me up for?"

"Quidditch." Sirius was wearing his annoying satisfied little smirk. "You do remember tomorrow is the match against Ravenclaw?"

"Right, right, yeah, whatever," muttered James distractedly, idly running his fingers through his hair.

"Here are your socks." Sirius handed him a pair.

James grinned. "You know me too well, Padfoot."

"I know you well enough to know that the only thing that could ever wake you up is the word breakfast, and that before Quidditch practice, you're always looking for socks," replied Sirius, shrugging dismissively.

　"True," said James, grinning. "And here's what I know: Marie was waiting for you last night at the Three Broomsticks, but you didn't show up. You're really gonna catch it this time, mon ami."

"If only I could catch that tongue of yours and-" Sirius made a violent wrenching motion that could've ripped a snake in two.

Breakfast was taken, as usual, after Quidditch practice. James and Sirius entered, looking mussed up enough to let every one know they had practiced, but not too mussed up. The moment Sirius strode into the room, he knew he was in trouble. Marie Fawcern of Ravenclaw was walking toward him as he sat down, and not looking so happy either. "Told you," whispered James.

"Shut up," hissed Sirius, and began to nonchalantly start piling food on his plate. He was halfway through a bite of egg, when a voice behind him asked, "What exactly was so important at seven o'clock yesterday that you didn't come?"

Sirius held up a hand and pointed at his mouth, which James could swear he had stuffed to buy himself time. Sirius washed it down elegantly with a sip of orange juice, then smiled pleasantly. "Well, if you really must know…"

"What, you've got another girl?" said Marie, face tight.

"Not exactly…"

"Then WHAT IS IT?" she cried. No one was really noticing her, except for the Maurauders.

"You're in a good mood," he muttered. Sirius put an arm around Remus. "Well, Remus and I decided to…"

But he was interrupted by, "YOU DISGUSTING FREAK! I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR FACE AGAIN!" and with a swish of robes, she swept away.

"What?" asked Sirius, eyes dancing wickedly. "I didn't do anything…right, Moony?"

"Well," Remus started removing Sirius' arm from his shoulder, "I think that she thought that you were implying something else…" he blushed, and his voice drifted off.

"Oh," said Sirius apparently thinking. The quiet peace at the Gryffindor table was broken by ear piercing shrieks, as Marie updated her friends on her love life.

"Can you believe it? He ditched me for another _boy_!"

At which James, Sirius and Remus laughed heartily. Peter didn't seem to get it, but he giggled shrilly, all the same.


	2. Remus' Patience Snaps

"_I've had enough already!"_

_- Marie Fawcern_

Later, at seven o'clock P.M, Remus was trying to study, as usual, Peter was reading some Muggle book, as usual, and James and Sirius were playing around. (As usual).

They were having what they called, 'The Monthly Official Pillow Fight,' which basically consisted of Sirius and James swinging pillows at each other haphazardly. "But," Remus muttered to himself, "Why did they have to pick tonight, of all nights, when tomorrow is a major Transfiguration test? I want to study," he said, his annoyance growing with his tone of voice. Finally, he turned on them, holding the text book in one hand, and clutching his quill in the other. "Will you two just be quiet for a bit? I want to study." These words had almost no effect on James or Sirius. "You guys!" said Remus a little louder.

"Huh?" asked James, at which he promptly got walloped on the head by Sirius' pillow.

"SIRIUS! WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP AND LISTEN? I WANT TO STUDY!" Remus yelled, and immediately felt guilty. Who was he to ruin their fun? He just had to put a little more effort into studying, he could've ignored them. Now they must think he was extremely ungrateful little swine, acting like he just did…

A clear voice split the stunned silence. "What is going on here?" asked Lily Evans. No one answered. James' twin sister, Tracin, quickly walked into the room, shooting a 'He's-my-brother-and-his-friends-I'll-handle-it look to Lily. Lily sighed and stalked off. Tracin took Remus' shoulders firmly and steered him towards his bed. Remus sat on it, speechless.

"Listen, Remus," began Tracin. "It wasn't your fault, and you shouldn't be feeling bad. _They_ ought to. _They _are the wrong ones, especially Sirius. What an idiot. It's not your fault."

"Well, I just yelled at my best friends. They risked persecution by law for me, and now…"

"So did I." Tracin reminded Remus gently. "And anyway, they take risks at everything. Remus; you think too much. You think people aren't going to accept you, you are terrified that you might hurt someone at full moon, you think about this and you think about that. But did you ever think that the reason why you are part of my brother's group is that they like you for who you are, and that they won't care about this in ten minutes; they'll just see it as another side of you. Guilt is among one of the worst kinds of self implied pain." She took his hand briefly.

"This," she informed him, standing up, "was not a prissy speech about self-esteem. I meant every word I said. I am going to talk to my brother, and nothing you can do will stop me." With that, she strode swiftly from the room, tossing her long black heir over her shoulder. Remus stared after her, wishing he had that kind of courage.

Within the next five minutes, he heard distinct arguing through the walls.

"We were just having some fun!"

"Yeah, well, Remus didn't seem to be enjoying your 'fun' very much, did he?"

"Well, he only got pissed off at us at the end!"

"The point is, he got pissed off at you! Leave him alone! You give him a hard enough time already."

"Oh, yeah?"

"Yeah. Constantly reminding him why his nickname is Moony, constantly reminding him of the pain, the torture, the knowledge that he can't control it!"

"We are able to accompany him now! He's happy about his transformations, for heaven's sake, Trace!"

"What, all because of your heroics? One day, I swear Sirius and James, I will find a good way to get you to relieve his fears. He's always living with it! You call him a bookworm, a nerd!"

"We're just teasing, he knows-"

"Does he?"

Silence.

Quiet, rational talking. Then the sound of footsteps on the stairs to their dorm. Remus quickly pretended to sleep. "Remus." James' voice had changed from the tone he had been using with his sister about ten seconds ago. "Remus," he said again gently. "We know you're awake." Remus rolled over to face them. "Look, we're sorry, okay? We never meant to hurt you, or make you feel uncomfortable. Tell us what makes you feel uncomfortable, and we'll try not to do it, okay?"

"Well," started Remus, grinning. "I do know that you were teasing. But," his face grew sober again "what Tracin said was right. I am always living with fear; I was raised with fear. My parents loved me but…they were a little scared all the time, as you can imagine. Also, one thing: like what Sirius did this morning makes me feel…weird. Don't really, I dunno, touch me I guess is the phrase, but it doesn't sound right…"

"Don't worry," said Sirius. "We get you. And we're also sorry. Friends?"

Remus grinned probably the widest he ever had. "Friends," he agreed. "Thank Tracin for me, will you?"

"Please," said a voice from the doorway. "Call me Trace."


	3. The Quidditch Game

"_Come on! Let's kick some serious butt."_

_- My track coach_

The next morning, every one woke up with a refreshing mix of excitement and nervousness. Matches with Gryffindor always began this way. Even though this wasn't the final, tenseness was humming in the air.

"Well," said Tracin said cheerfully as they walked toward the pitch. She played Chaser. "I think that Marie will have to break her promise to herself, and look at your face today."

Why?" asked Sirius drowsily.

"She's on the Ravenclaw team, you dolt," she reminded him, and laughed. Lily scowled. What on earth had persuaded her that going to a Quidditch match was a good idea? It was something along the lines of 'James will be there and Tracin's my friend…'

"You look just like Remus when you do that, you know?" said Tracin, suddenly appearing beside Lily.

"Yeah, well…it's not fair! I should be able to…sleep in." Lily asked irritably.

"Hey, no one forced you," replied Tracin shrugging her shoulders.

"You look just like James when you do that."

"Is that good or bad?" drawled James from the left.

Lily groaned in frustration and walked away. "What's up with her?" wondered Sirius aloud.

"I'll talk to her later," Tracin assured.

"Captains, shake hands," Madam Hooch ordered. James and Dave Rogers shook hands.

"And the match begins!" Sylvia Thrune, another of Lily's close friends, was commentating for the match. "And the Quaffle is taken immediately by Tracin Potter, zipping toward the goal and SC- no, she was feinting, and yes, now a SCORE! Gryffindor leads ten to zero..." Sirius was positioned as Chaser, and Marie, was Keeper on the other end. He knew there was trouble when she came speeding toward him, only to vehemently spin around in the air as T0:16 A2/P2racin scored another goal.

And so the match continued, ending with (another) spectacular capture of the snitch by James. As Gryffindor supporters cheered, Sirius couldn't help but glance at Tracin. She'd become a strange obsession. He watched her laugh, her teeth perfectly white and straight, her black hair shiny, her joking hazel eyes dancing, just like James…

Cut it out, he told himself. Hang on. Did this mean he had an attraction for James too? Jesus, his life was nutty. "Am I insane?" he asked himself.

He didn't notice he had spoken aloud until James said cheerily, "We've known that for a long time, Padfoot," He slung an arm over Sirius' shoulder. "Don't worry. That's the best part." Pretending to be disclosing a great secret in Sirius' ear, he half shouted, "I'm insane too!"

"So, James, what's _new_?" drawled Tracin from his other side.

"Oh, someone help me, I'm caught between the two Potter twins," wailed Sirius dramatically.

"As opposed to three Potter twins," Tracin quipped.

"That is not a problem, as far as I'm aware," said James, grinning. Now, for some reason, Sirius felt all shuddery, and watery. Was he getting sick?

"Um…I…have…to go do some…well…" he gesticulated hopelessly and shuffled off.

"Liar," Tracin called after him, still laughing. He shout's echoes followed him into the school.


	4. How to Solve?

"_Treat others as you would like to be treated."_

_- The Golden Rule, or so considered by some_

During the next week, the other three Maurauders and Tracin decided that Sirius was acting what they defined as 'very weird.' He didn't crack any jokes during Divination (why did they pick that subject again?), he didn't do any Binns imitations, and didn't make fun of the Potions master, Professor Savern. He was, possibly in the first time of his life, uncomfortable around James, and had begun to follow a gentle demeanor, he didn't stuff himself, he actually did schoolwork, at the slightest touch he would shiver.

"What is wrong with him?" James asked Tracin one night in the common room.

"Dunno," she said absentmindedly, "Why don't you go ask him?"

"Can never get a _straight_ answer out of you. You're reading your damn _book_ again," he shot at her.

"Well, you haven't been in the best of moods either, this week. You've have been acting just as normal as Sirius has. So go ask _him,_ not me. What am I, his psychology analyst?" she looked James straight in the eye.

James rolled his eyes at the ceiling, expressing his frustration. The ceiling didn't respond, of course, which is just as well. If it had reacted, his suspicions of his growing insanity would be confirmed. And you never tell an insane person that he is bananas.

"Go, then," she said patiently.

The next week was a very stressful week for the Marauders. Very. They got themselves in two detentions; one with Professor McGonagall for two weeks, doing different things each night, one with Professor Savern, helping pickle dead reptiles and amphibians, they got a lot of homework all of a sudden, Marie had made it her practice to try make up with Sirius (boy, did _that_ add a lot of stress…) Lily was completely ignoring James, Tracin was sort of ignoringeveryone, the full moon was in two days, and, to make it officially one of the worst ever weeks, the Marauder's Map was confiscated.

They held a short ceremony in respect to such a reverential object. Tracin and the Marauders raised their flag, which was stamped with a stag, a dog, a rat, a moon and a gray wolf on a white background, and saluted to it. Most people thought they were crazy, standing outside in the middle of October, solemnly saluting this strange flag that most people had never even seen before in their lives.

They dropped their hands to their sides. "We salute your departure, Marauder's Map, with grief. May you fall into more cautious hands."

They trooped back into the common room, to be greeted by a very angry Lily. She took Tracin aside. "What the hell do you think you are doing?" Lily hissed through clenched teeth. "You're just - standing out there, saluting a stupid flag for absolutely no reason!"

"Well, is there any rule against that?" asked Tracin mildly.

"Well-" Lily racked her brains. "YES! There is! No student may perform a ceremony without the Hogwarts seal present. You didn't have the seal, did you? Rule number 554."

Tracin rolled her eyes. "Of course we had the seal. Look." She took out a wax seal on a piece of parchment.

Lily glared at her.

"So, why are you so pissed off about this anyway?" wondered Tracin aloud.

"Not a smooth move, _Potter_, to address a prefect in that manner."

So, we're on last name terms now? Is that how she wants to do this? Heads up, people. I'm going to play dirty. Tracin thought grimly. "What're you going to do, _Evans_, put me in detention?" she sneered.

Lily turned away, visibly wincing. She turned on her heel without a word, softly crying, running up the stairs to her dormitory.

Tracin just stalked off in the other direction. She was not an insensitive clod, she was not an insensitive clod, she was not…

That night, Tracin went up the stairs normally, not caring about anything, really. She had homework…big deal. It was due the day after tomorrow anyway. She just undressed, threw on makeshift pajamas, then collapsed onto the bed, one hand on her forehead.

Why did Lily want to do this the hard way? What was she so pissed about? Why would she worry about the flag thing, and…? Ha, thought Tracin, smirking into the dark. I know the answer to _that _one…

She woke to a gray dawn. She turned over and tried to get to sleep, but couldn't. It was eight o'clock in the morning when she got back from breakfast, and Lily still wasn't up. Just to be obnoxious, Tracin pulled open the curtains to reveal the bright sunlight. Lily muttered and ducked further under the covers. Tracin grinned despite herself; Lily was just like James sometimes. "Do I _have to_ wake up?" Lily started to moan, then sat straight up. Getting darkly out of bed, she shot Tracin several ferocious glares, then dressed, making it clear that they were still enemies.

"Whatever," muttered Tracin, going back down the stone steps to find James. But he was nowhere to be found.

"Who cares. Um, then where's…everybody else?" She wondered aloud. She was just exiting the portrait hole, when Sirius bumped into her. Literally.

"Hey, Sirius!"

"Hey."

"What's up?" she asked him.

"The ceiling."

"Oh, _shut up_, Sirius," Tracin groaned, grinning. "You've never come up with anything lamer, and knowing you, Padfoot, that is _saying_ something."

"Er, Tracin?" asked Sirius awkwardly.

"Yes?" replied Tracin, frowning. What was _up _with this guy? And men thought _women _were temperamental, honestly.

"Are you going to be in the library on Thursday?" he muttered.

"Yeah. Duh, we all have to do that vampire thing for…Sirius?" as soon as he had her consent, he had walked away.


	5. Broken Up

"_Have courage for the great sorrows of life…..Go to sleep in peace. God is awake."_

_- Victor Hugo_

"Well, the simple Muggle conclusion is that for each scientific reaction there is an equal and opposite reaction, so it must be alvinine, there's no other way that verinyle could create _purple_ smoke," concluded Lily matter-of-factly. They had made up a week ago.

"You're actually _studying _for a Potions test?" asked Tracin incredulously. "Savern is the soppiest old bean plant you could ever expect to hear a lecture from!"

"But – oh!" Lily tilted back in her chair and performed a perfect somersault and landed at James' feet.

"Er-" began James.

Sirius smirked.

"Well – " started Lily.

Tracin smirked.

"Well, help her up, James, don't be and idiot and clean the I'm- so- intelligent- that all- I- can- think- of- is- er look off your face," said Tracin smugly. James shot his twin a look of utmost loathing and vexation, but slight gratefulness for snapping him out of his trance.

"What's with you, anyway, James?" asked Tracin, slightly surprised by the intensity of James' glare.

All he could come up with was a pathetic, "Don't you wish that you knew."

"And we conclude with the smartest thing humankind has ever been able to think of," muttered Tracin under her breath. "Lily, fix your skirt."

Lily blushed and pulled down her skirt as low as it would go.

"I never said that anyone had to go to a monastery," said Tracin mildly, flicking her wand at Lily, who suddenly was wearing a long, ankle length dress and a head covering.

"Love your new look."

"Shut-up-Tracin!" said Lily, snatching the veil off her head and attempted to Vanish it with a whip of her wand. It frayed slightly.

"Oh, give it here!" said Tracin impatiently, and Vanished it into thin air. "Are you still going to study for Potions?"

"Yes," answered Lily stubbornly.

"Fine." Tracin walked off, shooting her friend a wink. Lily tripped over her floor-length skirt, and frowned.

She shoved Sirius off the chair playfully and sat in it, while Conjuring another one out of the air. Sirius threatened to sit on it.

"Fine," Tracin replied indifferently.

As soon as he rested his full weight on the chair, Tracin made it disappear. He fell with a loud thunk to the floor.

"Sweet Mother of God!" he swore loudly. "What the hell'd you go and do that for?"

"Well, hell might be nice, y'never know," said Tracin cheekily.

"Will you two _grow up?_ " said James irritably.

"Hang on," said Tracin, appearing to think hard. "This is coming from _Prongs,_ god of tricks and immaturity?"

"Yes, it very well damn well is. And you can just shut the freaking hell up," said James shortly.

"Not to mention," Tracin glanced very exaggeratedly at Lily. "Social skills."

"I told you to shut the hell up and get on with your freaking life!"

"No, you told me to shut the freaking hell up, and said nothing about getting on with my freaking life," Tracin tossed back.

"HOLY JESUS! Can you leave me in peace for _five minutes?_" yelled James.

Madame Pince glared at them. "I suggest you all be quiet," she said reedily.

"Yeah, okay Madame Pince," James agreed readily.

"I'm leaving, James, and _freaking well getting on with my own damn life," _Tracin said, deceptively calm.

For the next three weeks, she didn't care an owl's shit about anything. She drank, got drunk, didn't do homework, didn't do anything, didn't do Quidditch, didn't find life anymore interesting than owl's shit.

James had never saddened his sister more. She couldn't trust him anymore. It wasn't spontaneous; it had built up over the years. Always being pushed off to the side, never talking to only him, straight and face to face; Tracin had no idea how much James cared for her. James didn't either, lack of expression of aforesaid emotion, of love, of care, had erased it off the map of his mind.

Thus, she lost the will to live. Her own brother telling her, in his own way, that she was the least important thing in his life, and that he was just about ready to marry her best friend, regardless of the effect it had on anybody's life, had an effect on her; that which I have just described above and am too lazy to repeat.

Tracin Potter was now the least respected girl of Gryffindor Tower for the remainder of November. Idiot Slytherins thought they could take advantage of her, and got their lights punched out. Idiot Hufflepuffs tried to warm up to her, got their lights punched out. Idiot anybodies who came along to her and tried to tell her anything got their lights punched out. She was living a life with all the lights punched out.


	6. Auldeng

"_No way! This is sooooo impossible!"_

_- Lily Evans_

The Christmas Holidays were fast approaching, and all of the Marauders were seriously worried about Tracin.

"What if she commits suicide?" whispered Remus.

"Be realistic, Moony, my sister, commit suicide?" said James. Raising an eyebrow. "Commit suicide my ass."

A small dark shadow was seen plummeting toward the ground from the Astronomy Tower.

"Oh my-" Sirius leapt up from the armchair where he had been sitting and with a crash tried to slow the figure down with his wand. But he was too late.

　_Heavy is thy conscience; I see it in your eyes…_

All of the Marauders boarded the train with heavy hearts; so heavy that they nearly caused a minor earthquake. Each of them dealt with it in his own way…

James finally left the compartment, with Sirius right behind him. "Er, James…"

"Go away."

"James-"

"JUST GO AWAY! WHAT PART OF THAT WAS SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?" shouted James suddenly, voice cracking in the cold. Then he recognized the look on Sirius' face. Sirius would not leave until he had made his point. They both sat down together in the last car; the open air one.

"James, listen…I miss her too…." Began Sirius hesitantly.

"Look, Sirius just lay off for a bit, okay? I've just lost my twin, I haven't told Mom or- Holy Jesus Christ," James swore.

"You haven't told Holy Jesus Christ?" asked Sirius uncertainly.

"No, dumb ass! Mom! My mother!" yelled James, standing up.

Sirius mouthed a few swearwords. "Oh, yeah…" James turned away from him.

Sirius stood up behind him. James was watching the gray sky with the utmost interest. A crystal shimmered in the air for a moment, a frozen drop of sadness in the air.　James was crying? Thought Sirius.

"The last thing I ever said to her was, Shut your bitchy mouth," said James finally, his voice wavering. "I don't know…" Suddenly he snapped. "I know. I'll jump too." Then as if confirming it to himself, James repeated more firmly, "I'll jump."

The words finally registered into Sirius' mind. To lose Tracin was one thing…but to lose James? It was, basically, unthinkable. He already felt despair with Tracin dead. But James? He might as well kill himself right along with him…

James strode to the door of the car, and yanked it open, and began to simply lean his weight out. "No!" Sirius shouted or whispered, he didn't know which, and immediately blocked James. He held onto the doorframe in front of James. James kept leaning his weight. His eyes burned with something like Tracin's…insanity in its rawest form.

James pushed, and Sirius managed too support both his and James' weight. "No," he said more calmly. "James, if you die, there is no reason for me to live."

The fire in James' eyes vanished, and he pulled away. But Sirius' arms were so weak, he couldn't manage getting back up. And so I give up the ghost…he thought as he felt his arms finally give way…then suddenly, a pair of strong arms carried him back onto the train. Whatever. Sirius' mind gave a small sigh, then he collapsed from physical and emotional strain.


	7. and this is worse hehe

_Wha!"_

_- my friend Charlie_

"Wake up, Sirius," said a soft breath in his ear. He did. He was surrounded by the Potter family.

"Where's James?" was the first thing that came out of his mouth.

"Right here, old eagle eye," replied a voice to his left dryly.

"Oh. Did you tell them?" asked Sirius.

"Yes." Wanda Potter's voice was no longer brisk as it had always been, but soft, like the brush of silk against fur.

They were all seated in the kitchen. Only James stood by the window. Staring out of it, his back facing the door.

"She was always the younger twin," he breathed. "I should not have done what I had. But now…it's too late more regrets. Silent tears rolled down his cheeks. "She will never come back…"

"Well," came a loud voice from the doorway. "I think that James has made some excellent progress today, but can someone help me with this stuff?"

Tracin Potter smiled back at them from the doorway.h


	8. The 'Adult Themes' Chapter

"_If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt."_

_Dean Martin_

"_The wine urges me on, the bewitching wine, which sets even a wise man to singing and to laughing gently and rouses him up to dance, and brings forth words that were better unspoken."_

_-Homer, The Odyssey _

"Sirius, I'm legal," said James excitedly.

"Yeah…so?"

b

"My dad keeps some in the cupboard, let's go." James tugged at him impatiently.

"What the hell are you talking about?" asked Sirius.

"_Firewhisky_, that's the hell what," replied James. "Now let's go."

Sirius stared at him.

"You got amazingly drunk on it, remember?" said James, sighing.

"Yeah, James, isn't that the problem?" wondered Sirius.

"Stop asking so responsible. Come on."

Meanwhile, in the dining room, a familiar scene was happening.

"Lily, taste a little," urged Tracin.

"It's wine, and it's more than I 've ever had in my life."

"Come on. Fine, I can't _make _you drink it, but just go on, taste it," said Tracin, a soft smile playing across her lips.

"You're only legal today, and you're drinking more that I've ever had in the past eight months," snapped Lily.

"Bit addictive, you know," said Tracin, smiling knowingly.

"You're an alcoholic," said Lily sharply, but wavering slightly.

"I only became technically legal today," Tracin shot back happily. "That doesn't make me an alcoholic."

"True," Lily agreed. "Oh, fine I'll try it…"

Half an hour later, Lily, who had, mind you, become completely drunk, collapsed into an armchair. She was giggling her head off, for no reason at all. Well, actually, there was a reason. She was under the strong influence of alcohol.

Suddenly, the chair shifted. "Wha?" Lily giggled. Well, she was giggling at everything anyway, so it didn't make any difference.

"Ow, Lily, get off me," Sirius protested, and shoved her halfway across the room, into something hard and vertical.

"Ow," said James.

"Oops, sorry James," Lily said, smiling. She looked into his warm hazel eyes. Oh, God, this was horrible. She felt his fingers gently explore her back, and giggled. This wasn't remotely terrible.

She strongly suspected that she was drunk.

James kissed her palm, his eyes never leaving hers. Then he kissed her mouth. Lily smelled the alcohol on his breath, and decided that it was very nice being drunk, then. He kissed her again and again, then stopped for breath. Her world was spiraling away. F responsibility. She wanted more…and he obliged…

H had begun to toy with the third button on her shirt when a bit of sanity shone through her intoxicated mind.

"James?" she said shakily.

"Mmmhm?" he said absent mindedly. It might have been because he was busy with her shirt.

"I can't-"

"Seem to breathe?" he murmured. "Natural, Lily dear."

"No- I-just can't"

She backed away from him, and fled into the dark, all the while repeating "I do not want James Potter," even though her body and her true mind told her differently. Very differently.


	9. Don't You Agree With Remus?

"_If the headache would only precede the intoxication, then alcoholism would be a virtue."_

_- Samuel Butler_

James woke up with the HFH. Hangover From Hell. "Oh, God," he groaned, and rolled over. He glanced at the clock, and winced. Even that slight movement of the eyeballs seemed to make his head throb even worse. It was about eight. "Ow," he whimpered, trying to keep his head from blowing apart altogether.

He stumbled down the stairs loud enough to wake Sirius up, and that's saying something.

"Oh…" Sirius moaned, as he clutched his head. "It's too damn early."

"I've known you since you were 11, Sirius. Are you in a bad mood?" Tracin asked mildly.

"Yes, I am in a fing bad mood," he snapped.

"Okay," Tracin said agreeably. "Want breakfast?"

"Yes, please," Lily said pitifully. "When are Remus and Peter coming?"

"They're coming today, along wit Sylvia and Katie. I swear, it's going to be an absolute MADHOUSE with you three with hangovers," Tracin said, reaching into the cupboard.

"It's not fair," James pouted. "You were drinking too. Didn't you have one?"

"Yes, I did. But I got rid of it," Tracin replied, too cheerful for the ones with hangovers. "Here's bacon, eggs, waffles, toast, jam, butter, milk, coffee, tea, sugar, ice packs, pain relievers, and fruits." Tracin listed the items as they zoomed onto the table.

Lily and James managed a weak 'thanks', but Sirius was indignant. "How'd you get rid of it?" he demanded.

"Not telling," Tracin said happily, skipping up the stairs. Sirius persisted.

"I've got a goddamn, fing hangover! How. Did. You. Getridofit!" he said teeth clenched for pain. His small speech would have been considerably more formidable if he hadn't been trying to swallow an aspirin pill and pressing an ice pack to his head.

"Tough luck. Live with it," Tracin snapped, indecently cheerful, and continued up the stairs.

"Bitch. Complete, god-forsaken bitch."

James didn't say anything, knowing that Sirius was liable to call anyone anything at any time when he was in the 'fing bad mood'.

The doorbell rang. Lily, James and Sirius winced.

The doorbell was really just for Remus to announce his presence; a few moments later the door clicked shut and Remus was standing in the kitchen.

"Morning, Moony," James mumbled.

"Well," Remus began cheerfully. "You all look properly deserving."

"Of what?" whimpered Sirius, as defiantly as he could manage.

"Of hangovers," said Remus sternly. "You look like you got decently drunk last night."

"I swear I'll never drink again," James groaned. Before? Mouthed Lily. The fact that James had broken the law horrified her. But the horrified expression was obviously too hard to maintain because with a flinch, it disappeared.

"We've heard that one before," cried Remus, continuing to mock-lecture them. "Lily, I'm surprised at you. You could at least have the decency to look properly ashamed of yourself.

Tracin appeared. "So," she began, clapping her hands (at which the hangovered ones visibly winced, and received two well-you-deserve-it looks). "Sylvia, Katie and Peter?"

Sylvia smiled. She had short, choppy blond hair, and sparkling, light blue eyes. Her frame seemed delicate, especially compared to Tracin, and she was like a china figure, slim and tall.

Katie was a treasure that many people overlooked. She wasn't fat, she just was just a little plumper than her best friend, Sylvia, and she wore thick, round glasses. Both her eyes and hair were chocolate brown, and she had a smile to light up a whole room. She was sort of like the lady in stories that was very nice, and when you cried dried your tears and said all the right things in all the right places.

"I'm going to take a nap," Sirius declared.

"Fine, whatever," James muttered, still in his subdued state. He flopped onto the couch. "Ow."

Lily walked as best she could to her rooms. The Potter mansion never failed to impress her. She traipsed up three set of stairs to her mahogany door, with a bronze plaque that read LILY EVANS (MR. POT BEST TORTE), Lily had no idea what the last bit meant, but Tracin sniggered every time she passed.

The inside of the room was personalized for her. The ceiling was low, and the whole place had a floral scent. Her bed was covered in a fluffy light pink comforter. (Pink was currently Lily's favorite color, she was very temperamental). The wallpaper was either palest of pinks or white, with lilies decorating it. Lacy curtains fluttered at the window, and lilies (rather precautiously, Lily thought) on the windowsill.

In the bathroom, Lily knew that towels with 'L.E.' embroidered on them would be waiting for her. Pink towels.

"Bother the bath," she mumbled, and went to bed.


	10. Marry Me Today, Or Tommorow, No Matter

"Don't you hate being publicly embarrassed?"

- Prof. C. Maclafflin, DADA teacher at Hogwarts

She woke with a slightly pounding head, but it was heaven compared to yesterday.

Lily looked out of her window, noticing that she was dressed in a light nightgown .she watched Tracin come in after her extensive morning workout, shook her head, and headed downstairs just in time to catch Tracin at the door.

"Tracin…" Lily began, and forgot what she was going to say. "Why do you look so good?"

"Whatever." But Tracin's point of view was different from most people. her body was seriously not whatever.

"Yeah, Tracin. Sometimes you even turn me on," James said, coming down the stairs. "Sometimes you even turn me on."

"That only because you can't help being turned on by every girl in range," Tracin retorted.

Katie, Sylvia and Remus came down the stairs. "Well, actually…" Katie began.

"Well, actually!" Remus said, grinning.

"You look like you need breakfast," Katie chirped.

"You basically look hot as hell," Sirius observed. "With sweat dripping off every inch of your extremely delicious body, those pants slung low on your hips, and the sports top-" he whistled-" and man, check out that figure! Tracin you are very much the ultimate."

"There are several retortions I am contemplating. One: is that supposed to be a compliment? Two: do you think you're gaining anything? Because you certainly are. In fact, you are gaining the exact opposite of what you probably intend. Three: there are more democratic ways to say those declarative sentences. Or are you Republican? I didn't even know you were American. Four: have you ever seen the ultimate administer a punch in the nose? Yet?" Tracin asked well naturedly, in contrast to her past statements, pouring coffee into a mug.

"No," Sirius admitted. "Tracin, just how strong do you like your coffee?"

"Medium." Tracin drained her mug.

Remus, Sylvia and Katie began to make cereal for every one. Peter came down.

"Wow, you look good this morning, Tracin."

Tracin inclined her head to acknowledge his statement. Sirius smirked. She ignored him.

"Now, that's when you know they'd be perfect married. When Tracin can ignore a smirk, unless, of course, she is smirking herself-" began James, and finished with 'Ow' because Tracin's foot had made contact with his shin. As in she kicked him.

Tracin nonchalantly began to pour orange juice into her coffee mug.

"Ew, Tracin, that's disgusting!" Lily said, making a face.

"So, it's economical and efficient. Well, it's not like I'm going to be cleaning the dishes anyway. Do you want to have to deal with an extra glass?"

"What a way to treat you guests," Lily sniffed, as Tracin finished her glass.

"Well, I'm going to shower." Tracin put her mug into the sink.

"Can we watch?" Sirius asked jokingly.

Tracin took the mug out of the sink, and smashed it on his head.

"And you have to clean it up," she said over her shoulder.

"I'll take that as a no," Sirius whispered, clutching his head. She hit extraordinarily hard.

Three hours later, Tracin asked whether anyone wanted to go out. "Me!" said everyone.

"But I'm the only one ready," she pointed out.

They left an hour later.

"The day after tomorrow is the Christmas Ball," Sylvia reminded them.

"Let's go dress shopping!" Katie suggested. "And the guys just come along…to see how hot we look?"

"Who's great idea was that?" Tracin muttered, but the boys perked up.

They entered the first shop they saw, MASQUERADE. It was basically a formals shop.

"Katie go first," Lily declared.

It was like this; everyone searched for the perfect dress for one person. Then they moved on.

"Why Muggle clothing, anyway?" Remus asked.

"Dunno," James mumbled, half-asleep.

"Let's get her something PINK," Lily suggested excitedly. All the girls, excluding Tracin, were rather excited.

"How about this?" Tracin pulled out a magenta dress.

"Okay!" Katie said happily. Tracin flopped herself into a chair.

"I'm worn out," she announced.

"Already?" Lily asked incredulously.

"Already?" Sirius murmured in her ear in a way that would've made Marie Fawcern melt like overheated chocolate.

"You know Sirius, YOU SUCK," Tracin said, venomously heated, yet conversational.

IMPORTANT STATEMENT. ATTETION PLEASE. NO, FLIGHT 747 IS NOT BOARDING. IT IS JUST SOMETHING IMPORTANT AS HELL. OR HEAVEN. YOUR PICK THANK YOU FOR PAYING ATTENTION TO THIS STATEMENT. NOW…

It was then that Sirius decided that Tracin was going to become Mrs. Potter-Black.

Katie came out, looking decidedly good. "Sylvia next," said Lily decisively. "Something BLUE."

Tracin rolled her eyes.

"I've found something I like," Sylvia said happily, holding up (what looked like to Tracin and the boys) a mess of frills and bows.

As Sylvia went to change, Remus asked with a yawn, "What's the theme?"

"Warm Radiance of your Low Intelligence," Tracin said, straight faced. James gave her a look.

"I forget.."

"It has something to do with reddish tones."

"Ah."


	11. Sirius Cannot Speak French

Author's Note: Sorry! I know it repeated. My bad. Now enjoy this new chapter that even bellatrixezpowerz and Tokyo-Titan haven't seen!

They spent the rest of the day finishing their shopping.

The next day, Lily awoke to a dead house. No-one else was awake. Carefully, she crept to the kitchen.

The breakfast table was all set up for her to have a simple breakfast.

She was dubiously sipping a coffee Tracin had obviously made when loud yelling and swearing came from somewhere below.

Sirius came out of a staircase Lily hadn't know existed, shielding himself from a series of ornaments who were repeatedly pelting themselves at him.

"Ow, okay, fine!" he yelled down the stairs. "Give up!"

The ornaments ceased to beat him, but, for emphasis, one tripped him and he fell at Lily's feet. She was so surprised that she dropped the coffee mug on his head.

"That's two cups in two days," said Tracin, coming up the stairs. "Are you very keen on breaking one mug everyday?"

"Because, you know, you do have the potential," James said, struggling to keep a straight face.

Sirius glared. "Not particularly, no," he groaned. "Oh, my sore head."

"Oh, that's too bad," Remus said, laughing. "We were thinking we might get you an agent! You seem to have a-"

"Great talent for breaking mugs with your extraordinarily hard head and thick skull," Tracin finished.

"Lily, are you done yet?" James asked.

"Um…" Lily blushed and looked down at her plate. She had been trying to avoid thinking about the incident two days ago. Granted, she had been drunk, (very) but she'd almost had sex with James. She winced at her very blatant thoughts.

"Um…" she repeated.

"Haven't decided yet?" Tracin said cheerfully. "Sorry, I'm going to have to decide for you." She grabbed the plated and smashed it into pieces over Sirius' head.

He rubbed his head. "Bite me, Trace."

She playfully grabbed his arm. "Will you two cut it out?" James asked, despite his large grin. "We WERE going to finish decorating before Mum and Dad come back. And also before Sirius tried to speak French."

"Okay. Suppose-" Lily glanced at the shattered plate on the floor. "I'm done. Let's go…"

They went down the narrow staircase to the Ball Room, or the Big Room, as Sirius aptly named it. It was majorly big. The high ceiling arced over the balcony and housed a huge mess of crystal and gold that James _said _was a chandelier. "At, least, it will be, when we're through with it."

"Right then," said Tracin, rubbing her hands together. "Lily, can you wake Sylvia and Katie up? Sirius, you go wake up Peter, James…you get the trees. Okay?"

"Since when do you boss me around?" said James indignantly. "I'm older, you know. "

"Yeah," retorted Tracin. "By a full four seconds. Move your ass."


	12. It's a Lily Impression

"_With your hands on my waist, and you kissed me like you meant it."_

_- Dashboard Confessionals, Hands Down _

"Oh my God, I am so nervous!" Lily exclaimed as she tried to put on her necklace.

"Why?" Tracin asked. "You look perfect!"

Lily stared at her reflection. Her dress was dark blue with a pleated gauze skirt and a satin strapless bodice. "I don't know…there's something missing!" she said, at a certain point of distress.

"I know." Tracin took the pearl necklace of Lily's neck. Tracin's hand brushed her shoulder, and Lily shivered. "You are way nervous, Lily. Calm down." Tracin rummaged in her jewelry box. "Here!"

"Oh…" Lily stared at it. The necklace was a beautiful masterpiece of interlaced crystal flowers, miniscule pearls and silver. "No…Tracin!" she said reproachfully. "You wear it."

"No," Tracin whispered into Lily's ear as she clasped the necklace around her neck. "Do you know what the flower is?" Lily could feel Tracin's breath on her bare shoulder. "It is a water lily. One of the most beautiful flowers in the world."

Lily felt Tracin's hands fiddle around her ears. "Um…Tracin?" Somehow this was reminding her forcibly of the night she had nearly shared with James. She felt Tracin merely smile.

"Okay…you know what, Lily?" Tracin said, observing her. "Your dress is too big. It is going to fall down if you even take one dance." Lily winced at the mental image.

Tracin played with the zipper in the back. "Tracin? What are you doing?" Lily asked nervously. She felt the zipper go down. What! her mind screamed.

"It's okay," Tracin said soothingly. "Um…so…"

Lily calmed down, but was relieved immensely when the zipper went back up. Then she felt Tracin's hands on her waist.

"You know what just popped into my mind?" Lily asked hastily. Oh, God, she was practically hyperventilating.

"What?" murmured Tracin, her hands still tucking at something on Lily's waist.

Lily tried to look over her shoulder, and found herself face to face with Tracin. "You thought of what?" Tracin asked softly, her clear hazel eyes burning into Lily's. Lily looked away.

"Just some lyrics," Lily mumbled.

"Mhm?" Tracin prompted, now working uncomfortably towards Lily's butt.

"Just, 'With your hands on my waist, and you kissed me like you meant it…'" Lily continued blindly. What are you thinking? her mind yelled. Hello? Aren't you in love with James Potter, not Tracin.

"Oh, ew ew ew ew ew ew ew! Gross!" Lily shouted.

Tracin did not seem mildly surprised, even. "What?"

"Mental image," Lily sighed. Why did she have such a vivid imagination? First it was James tangled in his sheets. That was way disgusting. And then…this? Kissing her best friend? Why was Tracin doing this anyway?

"Finished," Tracin breathed. "Turn around."

Lily gazed into the mirror. "Definitely better." She turned around to see Tracin smiling in a way highly reminiscent of James. I think I'm falling again, she told herself. Forget that. I've fallen.


	13. It's Just Our Impression

"…_out of key, to a hymn…"_

_-Green Day, Holiday_

Meanwhile, in the boys' room….

"Moony? Are you okay?" Sirius asked, frowning.

"Yeah. I'm fine!" Remus said happily, and sent a charming smile and a wink to Sirius. "Sweet of you to ask, though."

"Um, okay." Sirius returned a weak smile. "Remus – he began.

"What?" Remus turned, his concerned eyes just like liquid amber and gold mixed together, with the impurity of chips of emerald. The fatal gaze, Sirius thought ruefully.

"I – " Sirius' voice caught in his throat. "I'm confused."

Remus lips twitched. "Okay."

"I don't know how to explain it!" Sirius burst out, standing up. Remus looked over his shoulder at him, rather sadly, but said nothing.

Suddenly, Remus strode quickly to Sirius, covering the space between them in four strides.

"Remus, what - ?" But Sirius was locked in a tight hug.

"There," Remus said happily, his eyes twinkling mischievously. "Hugs have been scientifically proven to relieve stress and reduce blood pressure. You looked like you needed one."

"Um…okay…" Sirius said, regarding his friend curiously.

Remus laughed and tackled Sirius onto the bed. Sirius rolled over automatically, and so Remus ended up crushed beneath Sirius. "Ouch!" he squeaked, muffled by Sirius' body.

"Sorry," Sirius said, laughing and rolling over again, so that Remus was now on top of him.

"Guys?" James opened the door, and the scene before his eyes was undoubtedly strange; his two best friends on a bed, one on top of the other…? "Okay….um, sorry to interrupt…" he left, clicking the door shut.

There was silence. Remus and Sirius looked at each other. And then they roared with laughter. And then there was silence again.

This might have been the perfect time for the perfect kiss for somebody else, but not for Remus and Sirius. They were both quite as straight as a very straight board.


	14. Dressing Properly and Bathroom Doors

"_You think you know me…"_

_Ashlee Simpson, Autobiography_

Tracin descended the stairs to the Big Room with Lily on her arm. Sirius followed closely with Remus hovering nearby. Wow, Sirius thought. Tracin…

"Tracin!" he called. "Looking good." She grinned at him. He had of course, quickly observed that she wasn't wearing a dress, but a simple blouse and black pants, with an apron tied around her waist. An apron? She was going to serve? Hmmm. Mysterious. Her hair was in a perfect ponytail, accenting her simple elegance.

All four quickly rallied at the refreshments table. "Mmm. The Malfoys. How horrible," Tracin observed. "Hey, Sirius!" Tracin said excitedly. "It's Andromeda!"

"Whaat!" Sirius said, looking up from his lemonade, which had something in it. It was unmistakably his cousin, with her dark hair piled on top of her head, and radiant in a satin magenta dress with black detail.

"Thank my parents," James said. "It's not like I wrote the invite list."

"Mom?" Tracin turned around. "Hey, you look nice tonight." Indeed, Wanda Potter did. The lady always carried a certain amount of grace and poise, but especially tonight, in a simple hunter green gown of a beautiful silk.

"Tracin," Wanda said reproachfully. "Tracin, even your brother got dressed up tonight."

"That's only because Lily's here," said Tracin matter-of-factly. "And besides, he slacked off last year!"

"All right, dear, but as this is your last ball as a student. I'dve thought you would've wanted to go out with a bang, you know?"

"Mmm."

Sirius whipped around. "Where's Remus?"

"Dunno."

Sirius looked around wildly, and then saw what was distinctly Remus foot slip into the corridors, towards the bathroom. He quickly followed him.

"Remus?" Sirius tentatively pushed open the door.


	15. Pranking

"Remus?" Sirius called again.

"Mm?" Remus' voice echoed around the tiles of the bathroom.

"Er…what are you doing?" Sirius asked awkwardly.

"Going to the bathroom," Remus said in his patient, 'duh' voice.

"Um. Oh," Sirius said, feeling stupid.

"Like as in, bye?" Remus said impatiently.

Sirius left.

The ball was darkly lit, everyone waltzing to the music. Sirius frowned. He was in an odd mood today. The balcony and fresh air beckoned to him. He followed its call.

And found it already occupied. Lily and James were there. He quickly left his best friend and his now girlfriend alone, and climbed to the balcony in the highest tower. It shouldn't be…

"Occupied." But Tracin wasn't too busy. She glanced his way with a smile on her face. "Sit," she said, and drew up a chair.

"So, what do you think?" she asked. "Are the grounds not beautiful?" Sirius whipped his head around to look at her, and in doing so nearly broke his neck.

"Scenery?" he smiled - how very unlike her to talk about the grounds. And, really: what was with the poetic English? I'll play her game, he thought. "Does something weigh on your mind, dearest?"

"'Dearest', you say, and so would I have you enraptured," she said softly. Was that a laugh in her voice?

'So you already have me," he replied, ignoring the sense that told him she was making fun of him.

"How sweet." Tracin returned to her usual sarcastic tones. "Wonderful. Honestly, I think not, Sirius."

"Think what not?"

"The enrapturing bit, of course. Just the idea in itself is rather ridiculous."

"If you say so." His words were light, but he was withering inside. So she didn't think they had a chance.

"Can't wait to get out of this place," she remarked.

He tried to grin. "Yeah."

Tracin turned. "You know what? My brother and his girlfriend are taking a little too long for my tastes." She looked pointedly at an ice bucket. "Shall we?"

Sirius smiled fully for the first time that night. "Gladly."

"_The reason why we like to prank is because it's fun, Professor. Honest!"_

_-James Potter_

The prank was simple. It consisted of champagne, icy water, a rope and a flashlight. And of course, Sirius and Tracin. They crept down the steps to one balcony above Lily and James'.

The night air was very still, the silence only broken once during preparation by a swooping owl. The wind breathed sweet nothings into the tree's ears. Sirius tied the rope firmly around Tracin's waist, and she turned to him. "This is going to be awesome," she whispered, adding the last knot to the balcony rail.

"I know," Sirius replied. "All set?" Tracin rappelled along the side of the mansion, holding the rope in one hand, and the champagne in the other. She flipped the 'okay' to Sirius, who promptly dumped the water on their victim's heads. Which resulted in satisfying shrieks, needless to say. To finish it off, Tracin sprayed them with champagne while Sirius illuminated them with the flashlight.

That ought to attract a crowd, Sirius thought as he hauled Tracin back up and they slipped down the staircases to the main ballroom, where chaos was ensuing.

Thanks to them, of course.


	16. Goodbye

Disclaimer: BY THE WAY, I don't own anything, except Tracin and a few other invented ones. J.K Rowling does. I strongly begrudge her that. (Not, because if it weren't for her, than I wouldn't be here typing this ridiculous disclaimer.) Anyways, I could babble forever. On with the story!

"_I don't want to say goodbye/Let the stars shine through."_

_- Teddy Thompson, I Don't Want to Say Goodbye_

"Stay safe, study – " Mrs. Potter began to lecture her children.

"And yada, yada, yada." Tracin smiled. "Mum, we're adults now."

Mrs. Potter smiled, matching her daughter. "Grown though you may be, you're still my Anne Marie Tracingar."

"Mum, that's Grandma's name. Really, are you going senile?" Tracin grinned mischievously.

"I should hope not." Mr. Potter put an arm around his wife. "Did you know your mother wanted to name you Anne Marie?"

"Thank God you won," quipped Tracin.

"James – I expect you'll take better care of your sister." Mr. Potter was mock serious.

James looked his father straight in the eye. "I will," he said.

Lily and Sirius hung around the sides, not wanting to intrude upon the family goodbyes.

"Sirius." Mr. Potter held out his hand, and Sirius shook it awkwardly.

"Um, yeah…" he began. "About the summer…?"

"Sirius can stay with us, can't he?" James cut in, sling an arm around his best friend's neck. "Especially as his parents are – " he checked himself. "Are unhappy."

Mrs. Potter looked from James to Sirius, then back again. It was the least she could do for her son. "Yes, of course he can stay. Lily is welcome too."

"I dunno…I'll owl you, 'kay Mum?" Tracin flung out her right hand, and the trust purple bus came bouncing down the road to take them back to school.


	17. Hello Goodbye

A/N: JUST FOR THE RECORD, I don't own anything/anybody created by JK Rowling, Dashboard Confessional, or The Beatles. I do, however, own Tracin and a few other things, so….um…THERE.

"Hey girl/You've got a smart way about you/That makes me wish that I was smart enough for you…"

-Dashboard Confessional, "Hey Girl"

Lily whooped and belly-flopped onto her bed, telling herself that she would unpack her things later.

"Tracin…going to your place was fun, but personally, I'm glad to be back," Lily said.

"Oh, yes. I can't wait to getting shit loads of stuff due the next day, coupled with Quidditch…." Tracin replied sarcastically, then made a noncommittal noise of discontentment, and rolled over on her bed.

Lily smiled. "At least we're graduating this year."

"Damn it," Tracin said, sitting up, and shaking her long dark hair out of her eyes. "I don't want to leave."

Lily sighed somewhat indifferently, and stood up. "World, meet Tracin Potter, constant pessimist."

"World, meet Lily Evans, constant optimist," Tracin retorted. "Do classes start tomorrow?"

"Of course," Lily said, checking her hair in the mirror. "Where are Sylvia and Katie?" Tracin giggled.

"We-ell, Sylvia is on a date with Re-emus, and Katie's on a date with Pe-eter," she said in a singsong voice.

"No duh! It's so obvious! We all knew it was bound to happen…they make such cute couples!" Lily enthused. "Oh my gosh, they'll be able to attend grad together!"

"And who will you be attending grad with?" Tracin asked.

"Oh, I don't know," Lily said, sitting back down.

"I really don't mind if it's James, you know," Tracin said.

"I just don't know what he wants," Lily said. "I mean, look at it objectively, Trace, it's like he's the most popular boy in school, and what am I, but – "

"His girlfriend?" Tracin suggested, sounding highly amused.

----

"Love, love, love," crooned Sirius. "Love, love – "

"Shut up already," James said, throwing a pillow at Sirius' head.

"LOVE, LOVE, LOVE," yelled Sirius. "LOVE – Moony!"

"You love Moony?" James asked bemusedly.

"He's back from his – " Sirius and James grinned and finished, " – da-ate," whilst wriggling their eyebrows at each other.

"Is Wormtail with him?" inquired James.

"No – ye-ep." Sirius stood up and grinned wolfishly (doggishly). "Mwahaha," he added.

Remus and Peter entered the dorm, snow lightly dusting their jackets. "So-o," James said. "Was it OK?"

"Was it hot?" asked Sirius.

"Was she nice?" asked James.

"Did she make you pay?" asked Sirius.

Remus sat on his bed. "For me? No, depends, yes, sort of." He waited while James and Sirius tried to recall the order in which they asked what questions.

"Wait…so it wasn't OK but she was nice and she sort of made you pay, and I don't know about the 'hot' bit?" James said finally.

"An accurate summary," Remus said. "It wasn't OK, it was brilliant! She was so…nice, I suppose, and calm. I was sure I could trust her with any secret," he said, heavy emphasis on the last part. "I didn't tell her though, of course," he added hastily. "And we split the bill."

"Fair enough," Sirius said impatiently, "But it wasn't hot?"

"Sirius," Remus said.

"Please don't tell me, 'There is more to life than sex'," Sirius said boredly.

"I was going to say, 'I came in with snow on my shoulders,'" Remus replied.

"Oh, ha ha," Sirius said, sticking his tongue out at Remus.

"You, Peter?" James changed the focus of the interrogation.

"I suppose it was all right," Peter said dubiously. "I haven't been on many dates, so there's not much to compare it to." At this, James and Sirius grinned at each other.

"But it felt OK," Peter continued. "I mean, I always felt like I was about to say something ridiculously stupid or do something, but I guess I didn't, because she asked me out again."

"Hold up," Sirius said. "_She _asked _you_?"

"Yes," Peter said.

"Peter, mate, that's not how it's supposed to go!" James groaned.

"Oh," said Peter, crestfallen.

"That's OK. You can fix it later," James said indifferently, and crashed onto his bed. "I can't believe classes start tomorrow," he said.

"I can't believe we're going to be graduating," Remus said softly.

"Oh, my God, like hell yeah!" Sirius said. "I can't bloody believe we got through all this shit."

"You'd be good for Tracin," James said. "You swear almost as much as she does."

Sirius shrugged. "Yeah, well, there's a big difference between 'good for' and it actually happening."

Instead of jeering, James tucked his hands behind his head and smiled. "Well, it'd be cool to have you in the family."

"Marriage?" Sirius nearly screamed.

"Why not? Well, I've got stuff to do," James said, and rolled off the bed. "See you all later."


End file.
